


We opened our eyes and it's changing the view

by mad2thebone



Category: Ocean's 8 (2018)
Genre: F/F, Green Card Marriage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-06 15:14:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15888612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mad2thebone/pseuds/mad2thebone
Summary: The US government is trying to deport Lou. Debbie is not having any of it. And what's better than a little green card marriage to keep your best friend in the country?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a few things:  
> \- After two and a half years these two idiots finally inspired me to write again  
> \- Like many of you I firmly believe Lou Miller and Debbie Ocean are a couple but for the sake of this story they are not (yet)  
> \- Everyone else in this story is basically me, if someone told me they were really not a couple and I was imagining things (no one tried that yet, and why would they?)  
> \- There are probably a dozen other ways for rich people to stay in a country if they want to, but the story would be boring if they just paid someone a lot of money
> 
> So anyway, enjoy!

Even after pulling off one of the biggest jewelry heists in history and earning her fair share of 38,3 million dollars Lou Miller kept her Club. Other people water down the vodka, though. There's a manager now for the day to day business and Lou is more of a silent owner. She likes to come here, sit and watch people but not really engage with them. The barkeepers know to give her the good stuff, she doesn't pay, of course, and the staff knows where to send the cab if she had one too many.

It's also a steady stream of income, which is a nice side effect because living it up with no actual job might raise suspicions. What Lou didn't account for, though, was the letter addressed to her she receives when she walks into her managers office early on a Friday evening on her way to her usual spot in a corner upstairs.

It's a formal looking envelope with the emblem of the Internal Revenue Service on it.

Lou skims through the whole thing and it seems like they are charging her with a few thousand dollars for the last 3 years and a fine on top of it. There is a case number attached to it, too, and the name of an officer who's responsible for the investigation into her business. It's not much, lately she's paying that kind of money out of petty cash, it's more of an inconvenience and she could have probably just paid the actual amount of taxes for her vodka and anything else, it wouldn't have made much of a difference at the time.

She decides to do it immediately, before going to her usual spot. She writes a check and makes the manager put it in an envelope with the necessary information and put it in the mail. It stings a little, but mostly because it hurts her pride that she got caught doing such a mundane thing as tax evasion. Although she's probably going to steal it back somehow or other. There are always possibilities.

It ruins her mood though, and after only half a drink she goes home to her loft. It doesn't surprise her that the whole gang seems to be there. Technically they all have places of their own, except Debbie who never left, but all those apartments and lofts and houses seem to simply hold the purpose of storing personal things and clothes. All the actual living seems to happen here, at her place. She suspects Constance just to use hers for skateboarding, which is something she is definitely not allowed in Lou's loft. Most of her things are in one of Lou's guest rooms.

"You're back early," Debbie greets her, and Lou just groans.

"I've had the worst night", she answers and flops down on her couch.

Seven versions of the question "What happened?" are asked at the same time, but she just shakes her head.

"I don't want to talk about it."

There's a whole bunch of worried looks from Tammy and Rose mostly and some curious ones from the rest of them, and she is not expecting that they'll let it go easy, but to her surprise there is just silence and all of them glancing at each other. Tammy shakes her head in Debbie's direction and her eyes go comically wide while doing it, but Debbie just sighs.

"She will find out anyway." Debbie says.

"Find out what?" Lou asks at the same time Tammy says "just wait until tomorrow."

Lou looks between them and waits for them to continue, but they just keep up their staring match and their silent talking, so she demands "tell me. I'm a big girl, I can handle it."

 "There was something in the mail." Debbie says and points to the table before Tammy can say anything.

"And you read it?" Lou asks and gets up.

"No," is the answer she gets from several people at once.

"We didn't really have to," Amita says sheepishly. "It's from Immigration Services and it says 'urgent'."

The letter is right there on top of several others and the red letters are really just mocking her.

"I don't envy you." Constance says. "My parents used to hate those. Good luck with the paperwork and the endless phone calls."

Lou quickly opens the envelope and takes a deep breath before she starts reading. Just like with letter before she quickly skims over it, but she there's  two phrases standing out. She closes her eyes for a moment and slowly opens them again to see if the words have changed. Maybe she didn't read it accurately. She starts at the top and goes slowly this time, aware that there are seven pairs of eyes focused on her.

"How bad is it?" Debbie asks, but Lou doesn't listen.

She keeps looking back and forth between those exact two phrases that still haven't changed their meaning. Request denied. 30 days to leave the country.

"You're freaking us out, what's wrong?" Tammy sounds concerned.

Lou finally gives up on searching for the loophole, for a hint that tells her it's all going to be okay if she just applies again, or sends in form 5C to a certain office at the right time and looks up to her friends. They're all sitting expectantly on the couch waiting not so patiently for an answer.

"Well," Lou starts slowly and hands Debbie the letter, "I won't have to bother with phone calls."

 "What-?"

It only takes seconds for Debbie to understand what she holds in her hands. "They can't deport you," she all but screams.

"They seem to think they can."

There's a lot of confusion and different mixed up questions.

"I applied for a renewal of my green card a few weeks ago. It was denied." Lou explains. "I've got 30 days to leave the country."

"But why would it be denied? It has to be a mistake." Tammy says." You've lived in the US for years, these renewals are usually a formality."

"Yeah, about that..." Lou isn't too keen on telling them, but since there is the word felony somewhere in that letter Debbie still has in her hands it's going to come out eventually. "I've maybe had a tiny tax problem relating to the club recently."

"Taxes? How could you be so careless?"

"Geez, let her live, mom," Debbie mocks Tammy. "We'll figure something out, we always do."

There's that imperturbable but sometimes misguided confidence Lou is so fond of. She's not one to be self-conscious either but there have been some times where she would have liked to be that sure of herself and it calms her a lot. Debbie has always been the one who thinks bigger, more ambitious and therefore a little outside the box. Hearing her say it's going to be okay is like a promise.

"Like what?" Tammy is not that easy to calm down apparently.

Debbie takes a moment to think and everyone waits for her great solution.

"We do have a first class hacker," she says eventually and nods at Nine Ball. "Can't you just make it go away?"

"Make it go away?" Nine Ball asks amused. "You really have no idea how computers work, do you?"

"Of course I do. But that's not the point. The point is, can you do it?"

Nine Ball makes a grabbing motion towards Debbie and she gets the letter without further ado. They all watch her read it and somehow it feels like a weird play where they all act out the same scene over and over again.

"I could change the register, sure. Hang on, let me check this real quick." She gets up and walks out of the room.

"They're not going to deport you," Debbie assures her.

"You can hide in our places, no one's ever around," Constance adds. " Wait, are we losing this place?"

"The government can't take my property from me, I just can't live here anymore."

"Thank God."

"Good to see what's really important to you," Lou chuckles and after the first shock she slowly shakes the unsettledness. It's not like she has to go back to a war zone or something equally bad, it's just a little bit too hot for her liking. Also there are some memories she would like not to relive.

Nine Ball returns with her laptop and sets it up at the table and starts typing.

"It takes a moment," she says without looking up and all of their focus shifts back to Lou.

"What would you even do in Australia?" Amita asks.

"No idea, I'll figure something out." Lou shrugs. "I never really thought about going back."

"You don't have to leave," Debbie repeats," Nine Ball is going to fix it and no one is going anywhere."

"Yeah, about that...," Nine Ball chimes in, "that guy on your case probably has his files on paper, he sends everything he types to the office printer."

"So we have to break in."

"And then you want to break into his head so he forgets about ever working on that case?" Tammy has always been the worrier.

"He probably forgot already."

"How do we feel about money?" Daphne asks. "I mean, we do have a lot."

"Guys, I appreciate all of your enthusiasm, but this could seriously get all of us caught and I'm not going to do that." Lou says. "I should just leave, at least for a while. It's not like I have to actually go to Australia, I could just live in France for a while. Or maybe Thailand."

"You would hate the pretentiousness of France."

"I probably would."

"You should just marry an American," Daphne says and there's distinct agreement from all sides.

"Sure, like there have been a lot candidates around lately."

The last few dates she went on were years ago, and she had to take a lot of pity from Tammy afterwards, because she seemed to think Lou had a certain type in women.

"It doesn't have to be real. You just have to get someone to marry you, there are some options here, right?"

The first person Lou thinks of is Debbie, but that there's that gnawing feeling in the back of her head that tells her it might be a bad idea and so she looks around to see everyone's reaction.

"I'm married, I would have to get a divorce first," Tammy says.

"Well, uh... I don't know... I'm not sure how to explain..." Rose stammers but Daphne saves her.

"Rose and I have been going out for a few weeks, so it would be awkward."

"You're also not American," Debbie supplies.

"Right."

"Don't look at me," Constance says, "I mean, you're hot and all, but you're a little old for me."

"Seconded," Nine Ball agrees.

"I would, but my mother would have a stroke." Amita declares. "On a second thought, maybe I should, at least I would have her off my back then."

And finally there's only one answer left.

 "I'll do it." Debbie says and winks, "I am the obvious choice, am I not?"

"See, totally possible," Daphne says and grins.

"I don't know."

"Come on, it's gonna be fun."

" You already have the bickering down and you live together. It's a no brainer." Nine Ball adds.

It's a little bit scary how invested all of them are in this, but that's the risk of having close friends like them. Stealing millions and millions of dollars really brought them together.

"We all kind of live together," Lou reminds them and pushes Constance's legs from where they lie on the couch so she can have a bit of space to sit. "Although I don't know why."

"You love having us, that's why," Constance says, and she's right about that. Though it might have to do with loneliness in their own places, too.

"It's the easiest solution"

"When have you ever gone for the easiest solution, Debbie?" Lou scoffs.

"Might be a first," Debbie agrees," but if it keeps you in the country..."

It's ridiculous really, to think about marrying her best and oldest friend for a scam. To think about changing the one constant in her life to something that might fall apart. On the other hand, she would lose her at least partly if she had to move halfway across the globe. And those five years, eight months and twelve days were hard enough as it is, even though she would never say that out loud.

Her silence seems to last too long because Debbie continues. "I've never had a marriage. And if you get tired of me we can get a divorce after a few years. I've never had one of those either."

It's obvious, that she's not going to get out of this anymore. If she says no, those seven people are going to do something reckless behind her back and if she doesn't know what it is they're planning, she can't protect them, so finally she says, "fuck it. Why not."

"That's no way to accept a marriage proposal." Debbie scolds with a grin.

"I have not heard a marriage proposal so far." Lou retorts.

"Well, then prepare yourself to be swept off your feet."

"Why are you the one proposing?"

"Because that's how our dynamic works, I propose things, you tell me what's wrong with them and then we do them anyway."

"Fair enough."

Lou remembers their audience and sure enough, six people in various states of amusement are watching them.

"You totally have the old married couple down," Amita tells them but Lou chooses not to acknowledge that.

"So how are we doing this?"

"You're already in the country, so you don't need a visa." Nine Ball says. "You should just get married and then ask for an adjustment of status. You're filed as a relative and get a 2 year green card. In that time USCIS can come check out your place and your relationship and you basically have to prove to them, that the marriage is real."

"That is some very specific knowledge," Debbie states.

She just rolls her eyes and points to the laptop sitting in front of her. "What? Like I haven't googled _green card marriage_ the second Daphne mentioned it. You really gotta learn how to use a computer."

"We should make a list of all the things we have to do," Tammy says and takes a notepad out of her purse and starts to draw a bullet point. "We should start to prepare the loft tomorrow. All your things have to be moved into one room. We also have to get our stories straight, they're going to ask a lot of questions, we can't have one of you ruining the entire thing because of a falsely remembered date or dress color or something."

"We should have a little engagement party, we'll all take pictures and I date them back in your phones a few weeks, that'll make it look more legit." Nine Ball adds and Tammy scribbles frantically.

"What about the actual proposal? Should we have pictures of that?" Lou asks and Nine Ball just shrugs.

"You could just do it at the party."

"I would never ever say yes, if someone asked me to marry them in front of a group of people." Lou says emphatically. "Not in any universe."

"Well, then we'll have to have a romantic dinner here and give the lady what she wants." Debbie says with a little bow. "But the lady will have to cook, otherwise dinner will not look good in pictures."

Lou chuckles at that. Debbie has never been good with simple tasks. She just strolls into a restaurant and walks out with a full stomach or a bag of food and an apology by the chef and it really shows when she tries to do anything at home.  "I'll manage," she says, because contrary to Debbie, there was a time when she had to learn to provide for herself.

"What about your families?" Daphne asks. "You don't have to come out to anybody, do you?"

"I have been out for my whole life, it's part of the reason why I don't talk to my parents, so no, that won't be a problem." Lou explains. Once upon a time that topic stung, but she made peace with it a long time ago.

"My parents and my brother are dead, I don't really talk to anybody else in the family, so no invites for my side either," Debbie says nonchalantly, but Lou sees the sad smile that appears on her face for a second.

"Small reception, got it."

"We don't have to do all that tonight, do we?" Lou asks and yawns, because she was tired enough when she returned from the club, but now she's exhausted. She didn't have a single minute to herself and the whole life-falling-apart thing really took a toll on her. "And you seem to have all this under control, so I can probably go to sleep."

"Of course, we got you," Tammy says sympathetically.

"Just one more thing," Debbie says and Lou's about to smash her head into the couch because she doesn't want to hear any more wedding stuff, but then Debbie smirks and points to Daphne and Rose. "Don't you want to know about those two? Don't think we forgot."

*

They move Debbie's possessions into Lou's room the next day. She doesn't really own much, mostly clothes, and it's not much effort to create some space in her walk-in closet. The bigger challenge is having someone to sleep next to her, because Lou is used to being alone. She has known Debbie for more than twenty years, but while they spend a lot of time together during jobs, they always had their own spaces.

The first night she lies awake in her bed and listens to Debbie's breathing, who doesn't seem to have a problem sleeping anywhere. But she has been to prison for a long time, so Lou supposes having one person next to you doesn't compare to a tract full of dozens of inmates.

She considers sleeping on the couch for a moment, but this is going to be her reality for the next years. It still doesn't feel real, but it is a commitment they're making. She's honestly surprised Debbie agreed to this and hasn't backed out so far. The marriage might not be real, but the time they put in is. They can't start any big jobs for at least two years, because they'll be under tight observation and they can't risk to have to disappear for a while. And Lou knows how much she loves planning heists and cons. She doesn't think Debbie has been in one place for two years since the moment she left her parents' house, except for prison.

Maybe she should plan them a vacation to make it easier for her. They can say it's a honeymoon getaway once she has her conditional green card. If she even gets it. She still thinks someone will see this as the scam it is.

It's not that she has never thought about spending the rest of her life with Debbie. She has. When they first met, she was blown away by her confidence and cockiness and she even admits to having a crush back then, when she was in her early twenties and had freshly arrived in a strange country she now calls home. But she quickly noticed Debbie's type, which is sleazy guys like Claude Becker, so she settled for the role of the best friend and partner in crime, which objectively has been the more durable and therefore the preferable option.

Tammy has her own opinion of their situation, Lou is well aware of that. Over the years she has been subjected to a lot of unsolicited advice from her. Tammy was always convinced there was some sort of once in a lifetime romance in the making, instead of a fleeting thing from twenty years ago, and Lou never managed to convince her otherwise. It's really the most annoying thing about Tammy and also the reason she didn't name her first when they tried to come up with members for their team.

"Why aren't you asleep?" Debbie's sleepy question comes crashing through her thoughts. She hasn't even moved yet.

"Don't worry, go back to sleep."

"I can hear you thinking," she mumbles, "it's very annoying."

And okay, maybe Lou has turned a few times in the last hour. "I try to be quiet," she promises. "I'm not used to someone sleeping here."

"I always told you, you should get a sex life." Debbie sounds more awake with every word.

"I have a sex life," Lou scoffs, but she chooses to ignore the fact that her last date was months ago, long before Debbie came back from prison . "Still doesn't mean anybody has to actually sleep here."

"Touché. So what are you thinking about?"

"Is that whole marriage thing crazy?"

"Of course it is. When has that ever stopped us? It's just another well orchestrated scam. It's what we're good at."

Debbie might have a point there, but there's still something gnawing at her.

"Yeah, but there are no diamonds at the end of this one." Lou says and continues quieter, "you won't be able to run any jobs for all this time, so why are you doing this?"

There's a moment of silence and it's rare for Debbie, to actually think about an answer first instead of just having an evasion handy at any time.

"Because I intend to run jobs for the next twenty to forty years and I need my partner here and not somewhere on the other side of the world. I'm just playing the long game."

"Forty years, huh?" Lou has to laugh at that. "We'll be old by then."

"What, you think we won't rob someone in the old folks home? Or rig a game of bingo?"

"Good to know your priorities." Lou still laughs, but Debbie thinking of them working together for the rest of their life is strangely calming.

"Also, I love you, and I don't want you to leave."

For a second that knocks the wind out of her. They're not the kind of friends that tell each other how they feel all the time, never have been, so this is completely unexpected.

"Happy now?" Debbie asks after a long silence.

"Sure." Lou coughs.

"Then go to sleep now."

She doesn't have any problems falling asleep after that.

*

They apply for a marriage license the next day. Tammy is really on their toes about the time they have left. She has always been the _rather sooner than later_ kind of person, while both Lou and Debbie like to take life day by day when it comes to ordinary, not heist related activities.

She plans their proposal dinner for the same evening and to Lou's absolute surprise her loft is empty when she gets home from the city hall. Debbie is still out to get a ring.

She enters the living room and finds everything prepared for a romantic evening. The table is set for two, there are candles, although not yet lit, a small bouquet of flowers matching the tablecloth and three different bottles of wine. A new calendar is hanging on the wall and it is set to June instead of September.

Lou takes the groceries she got on the way back home to the kitchen and decides to start preparing dinner. By the time she hears someone enter the loft she had time to change, there are some potatoes almost ready in the oven, mousse au chocolat in the freezer and everything else ready to be thrown in a pan.

"I should propose more often," Debbie says when she comes into the kitchen, "if that's what it takes for you to cook."

"Only the best for our precious pictures."

"To bad one can't smell pictures, but seriously, why don't you do that more often?"

"I would, if seven people stopped raiding my fridge constantly," Lou says and it's true. Her fridge used to be a lot better stocked before she had more or less permanent house guests. But after looking for something that definitely used to be there the day before more than once, she stopped doing that and everyone started ordering food all the time.

"Baby, I'm hurt," Debbie says dramatically, "I'm gonna be your wife, you can't include me in that."

 "I can, and I will."

Debbie laughs at that. "Should I set up the table?"

"Tammy already did." Lou answers and Debbie leaves the kitchen to check out the living room.

"She really outdid herself," she calls from the other room and comes back with one of the bottles. "White, red and rosé, that woman prepares for everything."

"You can open the red one," Lou says over the sizzling of the beef in the pan, "and then go sit down."

"Yes, ma'am," Debbie says with a mock salute.

When Lou comes in a few minutes later with the food, apron changed to the jacket of her pantsuit, she takes Debbie in in all of her glory for the first time. She stands next to the table wearing a black dress that probably hung in some designer store a few hours ago. It is high cut, but it fits perfectly and shows off all of her curves and Lou is only human, so her eyes linger probably a little bit too long.

"You look nice," she says in what is probably the understatement of the century, and sets the plates down.

Debbie doesn't show as much restraint when she regards her from head to toe. She's clearly stuck gazing at the very low cleavage under Lou's dark red pantsuit.

"So do you," she says, sits down and puts a small black box on the table.

"What's the plan?" Lou asks. "Now? After dinner? With dessert?"

"There's dessert? I could get used to this."

Lou takes out her phone and points the camera at Debbie."I spent a lot of time making this look as good as it does so it better is in a picture," she says and taps the screen. And then a second time.

"Let's eat first," Debbie decides and takes her fork.

Lou gestures her to start and digs in herself. She hasn't eaten all day and notices how hungry she actually is once she starts so she starts eating fast and in silence.

"That is really good," Debbie says in between two bites.

"I did cook for the Met gala," Lou rolls her eyes.

"I know. Learn how to take a compliment, Miller."

"Fine, thank you."

"See, easy."

"You're irritating." Lou says, but there's a hint of a smile on her lips, she really loves their banter.

"So you've told me." Debbie grins and gets up. "Lou Miller."

How she's able to get down on one knee in that dress is beyond Lou's comprehension, but she sure does it with ease and Lou's heart stops for a moment.

"What are you doing?"

"Proposing."

"You don't have to do it for real."

"Just let me do it." Debbie says and takes the box in her hand and opens it. "I've known you for the better half of my life, you were there for every step of the way in my career, my partner and more importantly my best friend and I can't imagine my life without you. So, Lou Miller, will you do me the honor and become my wife so we can grow old together and rob the old folks at the old folks home."

She manages to keep a straight face until the last word but then Debbie breaks into a grin and Lou starts laughing. "That was so cheesy."

"And that is not an answer."

"Yes, Debbie Ocean, I will marry you, you knew that before."

"I'm just striving for realism." Debbie shrugs. "If this is the one marriage in my life, I want to do it right."

She takes Lou's hand from the table and carefully slides the ring on her finger. It fits, of course, because they took the measurements before Debbie went out shopping, and it's really beautiful. Contrary to what one might expect from a jewelry thief it is very simple, white gold with small stones, undoubtedly real, but inconspicuous enough to wear it on a daily basis.

"It's lovely."

"I didn't even steal it."

"Must be real love," Lou jokes.

Debbie wiggles a little and almost falls to the side then. "Could you...?" She grimaces.

Lou gets up and grabs Debbie by both hands and pulls her up.

"Kneeling for that long hurts like a bitch." Debbie complains and rubs her knee.

"You're not twenty anymore." Lou laughs.

 "Neither are you."

"Fortunately. I'm so much cooler than twenty year old me."

"That's true." Debbie agrees and takes out her phone. "Show me your sparkly hand."

She takes one of Lou, that's the easy one, but then she gets next to her and holds the phone in front of them. The first one is blurry, in the second one Debbie's eyes are half closed and in the third the hand slipped right out of the frame.

"Fuck."

"We should have the calendar in the back," Lou reminds her.

They turn a little, trying to fit everything in the frame and after a few more tries they get it right. Encouraged, Debbie takes another one, this time with her lips to Lou's cheek and Lou is glad that it only takes a second, because she is most definitely blushing and there can't be any footage of it.

She still looks flustered in the picture, but it works with the _I just got engaged_ theme they're going for.

*

They're having the engagement party the next evening. It's really just the eight of them, so it could be any regular evening at the loft, but Lou serves her good liquor and everyone takes random pictures to document the event.

"So, how was the romantic evening?" Nine Ball asks, as soon as they have all arrived.

They show their pictures and the ring, it makes for great photos. Lou could do without all the swooning and sighing by mostly Rose and Tammy, but she can't just tell them to tune it down without explaining that it all feels a little too real for her liking.

"Were there some leftovers from that food?" Constance asks, and Lou's grateful that not everyone is equally invested in the wedding.

She debates teasing her some more, but decides against it. "There's mousse au chocolat in the fridge," she says and Constance is already almost in the kitchen, so she yells after her, "it's for all of us."

She comes back with the big bowl and a bunch of smaller ones a few minutes later and they all take some.

"So, what do we have to know about the proposal?" Tammy asks.

"She really did it," Lou says, points to Debbie and laughs, "got on her knee and everything, right after I told her she was irritating."

"You should absolutely have that in your story," Amita says and everybody laughs while Tammy gives Lou a knowing look.

"See, we don't have to get our stories in line because it actually happened," Debbie says, "you can admit that I'm brilliant now."

"And so humble."

The evening goes on with some more details from the night before and Lou's successful attempt not to get caught in a room alone with Tammy. She knows she's going to corner her eventually and she's briefly wondering if she ever did that with Debbie before.

"I'm changing the time code in the proposal pictures to June 23rd, so a few weeks after the Met gala," Nine Ball later explains. She has her laptop with her and has the first phone plugged in. "And tonight's pictures to June 30th, a week later. That's the time frame to make your engagement look legit."

"That leaves us with roughly three months since I got out of prison." Debbie says.

"Not that much time to get engaged," Tammy agrees.

"What? That's plenty of time. Actors do it all the time," Daphne objects.

"Yeah, but we want it to look like a stable, long-lasting relationship," Lou says.

"Oh, right."

"So, did you date while you were in prison?" Amita asks.

"Probably not, because I never visited her," Lou says and she does feel guilty about it. Sure, she was pissed at Debbie for working without her and for getting herself caught in the first place, but now that she's back in her life she can't help but think that she let her down. She let her sit in there all alone and never even wrote a letter.

"How about we dated before, for let's say a year or two, then we broke up, I got caught and you were angry at me. I got out and we reconciled." Debbie shrugs. "Almost the truth."

"That'll work."

The others continue chatting, but Lou doesn't really listen.

"I should have visited," she says quietly to Debbie after a few moments.

"We weren't talking, no hard feelings."

"Still, I should have overlooked the fight and visited, it must have been lonely."

"I was busy planning the Toussaint heist," Debbie says, and Lou knows she's deflecting, but this will probably be the closest they'll ever come to talking about that issue, so she should just let it go.

She still can't explain what made her go off back then. They had a few fights over the years, sure, but never like this. They were arguing about a job. She thought it was too risky, but Debbie wanted to do it, of course. Lou accused her of being unfocused, which she never was, and it got personal really quick. But she had just started dating that unshaved imbecile and - oh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be Debbie's pov, because I wanted to ogle Cate Blanchett gifs...


	2. Chapter 2

Debbie Ocean was never the kind of girl who imagined her wedding. Her family simply had different priorities. Eight year old Debbie wanted a set of picklocks for her birthday, thirteen year old Debbie dreamt about stealing the kind of clothes her parents with their struggling schemes never could afford and sixteen year old Debbie was always busy planning the heist of a new pair of sneakers or a new jacket. Twenty year old Debbie discovered her love for diamonds when Danny showed her the prize of his first big job.

Dreaming about romance or relationships simply was never a priority for her, but if she had imagined her wedding, it probably wouldn't have looked like the real one that's only minutes away. Less marrying her best friend, less green card issues and probably a little more romantic location. But since she never had those dreams, she's not disappointed by the actual outcome.

She enters the City Clerk's Office with Amita, Daphne and Rose and nervously plucks at the seam of her dress. They didn't do the whole separate places for the night thing, but they got ready separately and agreed to meet here. Not that they even wanted to do that, she's not superstitious and on top of that why bother for a fake marriage, but the others insisted and both her and Lou got tired of arguing after a while.

They arrive at the right floor a few minutes later and Lou, Tammy, Nine Ball and Constance are already waiting. They haven't talked about their outfits, just agreed to dress up a bit since there won't be another ceremony and the reception is right after, so Debbie's jaw almost drops to the floor when she sees Lou.

She expected her to wear a pantsuit, she doesn't wear much else anyway, but she didn't expect her to wear a tux with a small black tie. It's perfectly tailored and her legs go on for days. Her hair, usually skillfully tousled, is combed back and silky like it never was before. Debbie has always known that her friend - soon to be wife- is hot, but this is a whole new level and she can't stop staring.

They meet up with the others and everyone starts chatting, they're complimenting her dress and Lou's tux ad she tries to deflect it with her usual cocky self but for some reason she doesn't register most of it. Instead she locks eyes with Lou, who smiles softly at her.

They're called not much later and the eight of them walk into the marriage bureau. There's a table for four in the front and Debbie and Lou follow the officiant to the front. The woman tells Tammy and Amita, who are going to be the witnesses, to take their places at the table, and the rest of them sits down behind them.

 They show her all the necessary documents and it's all a bit underwhelming.

"We are gathered here today to unite Louise Miller and Deborah Ocean in marriage in the eyes of the law," the officiant starts. They have never met the woman before, so they can't expect her to do a special personalized ceremony. "Marriage is perhaps the greatest and most challenging adventure of human relationships. Create your marriage through love and patience; through dedication and perseverance; through talking and listening, helping and supporting and believing in each other; through tenderness and laughter; through learning to forgive, learning to appreciate your differences, and by learning to make the important things matter, and to let go of the rest. We are here to witness and affirm the choice you make to stand together as lifemates and partners.

Debbie focuses on Lou, looks deep in her blue eyes. Lou, who has always been her anchor, the one who keeps her from flying too close to the sun. There is no way she could have ever let her move across the globe without her.

"Do you, Louise, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

Lou takes a deep breath before answering, "I do."

"And do you, Deborah, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do," she says without hesitation.

"Do you have the rings?" The officiate asks and Lou takes a small box out of her pocket.

Debbie takes Lou's hand in hers and places the ring at the tip of her ring finger. "Nothing could be better than spending the rest of my life with you," she says and slides it on.

And she means it. She knows divorce is an option, but she has learned her lesson about dating unreliable guys, so she secretly hopes they fall in that kind of rhythm that sticks and Lou will never think about it.

It's Lou's turn and she already has the ring in place. "To new adventures," she says.

"By the power vested in me by the State of New York, I pronounce you wife and wife, you may kiss the bride."

Debbie takes control of that. She's a bit annoyed that she has to stretch so she cups Lou's face and pulls her down to her level. She thought she would finally see eye to eye with Lou in her high heels, but of course Lou had to put on even higher boots. She closes the distance and their lips touch. They haven't talked about kissing, but she's not going to let this be a small peck, this is their wedding and the kiss should be appropriately meaningful.

She pulls Lou closer and tilts her head a bit to deepen the kiss and God, this feels good. She hasn't kissed anybody in ages.

She also can't remember being kissed back like that, soft, without further intention. Kissing for the sake of kissing. And she doesn't really want to stop, but then there's whistling and she remembers that there's people watching them.

They put a bit of distance between them and she looks around. Constance is pointing to Nine Ball who doesn't look the least bit sorry and Debbie grins. It's probably better this way.

They have to sign the papers and then they're free to go.

 "So, Deborah and Louise, how does it feel to be married?" Constance asks and puts her arms around both of their waists as soon as they're out of the door. It's cute that she can't reach their shoulders.

"Call me Louise again and you'll never find out," Lou threatens but there's a smile on her face.

*

They arrive at restaurant they have booked for the reception half an hour later. They have invited a few people but it's still a small party. Old friends, some who they've worked with, the manager of Lou's club and Tess. After some time to think about it, Debbie decided to ask her. She hasn't seen her in years, but she is still her sister in law.

They say hello to a few people and take their places at the center of the table. A few waiters come to take their orders and once everyone has a drink placed in front of them Tammy and Amita get up.

Debbie looks at Lou next to her and she just rolls her eyes. They told them they didn't have to make a toast, but they were determined to. Debbie just takes Lou's hand and smiles, they have to play a role after all.

Tammy taps her glass with a fork and all eyes are on her.

"I've known Debbie and Lou for almost as long as they know each other. I didn't meet them together, it was just Debbie asking me questions to figure out if I could be useful to her because that's how she makes friends. Ten minutes later I had to meet Lou. That's how it's always been. I saw it then, how much they loved each other, but it took them a while to notice to put it mildly." She makes a short pause and every person in the room laughs. "I can't remember how many times someone asked me if they were really not together."

"I was one of those people," Amita continues the speech. "My mother is the kind of person who always ask _'why aren't you married yet'_ and bugs you about your relationships. I hate it. Can you believe how excruciating it was to see those two and constantly think _'why aren't they married yet?_ '"

There's more laughter and Debbie grins, too. She should have expected them to not let her and Lou off easy. Both Tammy and Amita seem to have fun mocking them. They must have rehearsed the speech, but their comedic timing is great, and though they pile it on pretty heavy she has to admit they're funny.

"But then finally they got their shit together. By the pace they were going I thought it would take them until they're eighty for one of them to make a move. I'm glad it didn't, because Tammy and I were this close to locking them in a room together until they figured it out and I'm not sure we would have survived that."

"It took a few more years to get here. A break up, some jail time, every relationship has it's obstacles, right? But we're glad you made it." Tammy says and raises her glass a little higher. "To Debbie and Lou."

"To Debbie and Lou," Amita repeats and everyone follows suit and then they all drink.

"They made us sound like the most dense people," Debbie whispers to Lou. "I can't believe anybody would buy that."

Lou just hums noncommittally.

The food arrives shortly after and it looks and smells delicious. She has to let go of Lou's hand, though and she wasn't even aware she was still holding it. It's funny how easy they slipped into their roles.

"I'm going to talk to some people," Lou announces after dinner and acting on impulse Debbie grabs her tie before she can get up properly. With their faces a mere inches apart Lou gives her an amused look. "Excuse me?"

"I like the tie," Debbie says and kisses her. She thought about it since their kiss at the ceremony, and why not? It is their wedding day after all, people expect them to kiss. And who cares if she prolongs it for a little longer than necessary.

She releases the tie from her grip and when there's a bit of a distance between them Lou raises her eyebrow. Without another word she gets up, slides her hand lightly along Debbie's shoulders and saunters away.

"You're really lucky," a voice says while Debbie watches Lou swing her hips with each step and when she turns around Tess sits in Lou's abandoned chair. "You know, I loved your brother and I learned to tolerate what he did, but I never liked it. It was the one thing we never agreed on. But you have found that one person in this world who's with you for all of the way."

It's funny how none of the guests has batted an eye at their marriage announcement. She expected at least Tess to suspect something was up, she did see through a lot of Danny's schemes after all, but she's not going to tell her if she doesn't ask.

"I know," Debbie says instead.

"You know what's also great?" Tess continues. "If you ever get caught, you don't have to testify against each other."

"We won't get caught," Debbie states, but she appreciates the sentiment.

*

They say goodbye to their guests after a few hours of conversations, drinks and a lot of jokes at their expense. Everyone seemed to think it was hilarious that it took them allegedly more than 15 years to get together.

They thank everyone for coming and are sent off by Constance shouting "Go get some!" while the rest of the girls are hollering.

"What are we doing with the rest of our evening?" Lou asks when they get back home.

Debbie shrugs. The day was exhausting but she's not tired enough to go to bed.

"We are alone for once," she says and they look at each other and come to an agreement.

"You get the snacks, I get drinks," Lou says and disappears to the living room.

Debbie goes to the kitchen and finds a bag of chips and some chocolate in Lou's secret drawer. When she joins Lou on the couch she has already set up Netflix on the TV and there are two glasses and a bottle of whiskey and some water on the table.

"My whole list is just rom coms. I should have a password for my account." Lou groans.

"This one is with Daphne, do you think she put that on the list herself?" Debbie asks and laughs.

"Nah, probably Rose."

"Oh, murder documentary," Debbie points out.

"Seriously?"

"Why not?

"You want to watch something about solving crimes?"

"They make us look like the nice criminals," Debbie says and in the next moment the guy in the preview voiceover says _'I don't regret it'._ "See. Though we can always watch _the notebook_ or any other hideous movie on that list."

"Just put it on, I don't need to see what straight people think is romance." Lou slouches into the couch and Debbie lies down and lays her head on her lap.

After a few minutes of watching in silence Debbie feels Lou shift beneath her. She looks up at her and sees her typing something in her phone, so she returns her attention to the screen. After a while Lou snickers quietly.

"Americans are ridiculous," she says.

"And yet, you want to be one."

"I want to stay here, that's different."

She shows Debbie the website she's on. It's an immigration site and the headline is _Green Card Through Marriage - Interview Tips_.

"It says we _'must avoid flip flops and shorts',_ " Lou laughs. "Imagine believing you have to warn people about that."

"Almost makes me want to wear flip flops and shorts," Debbie snorts.

"As if you'd ever wear that."

"Says Miss Sleeps-in-a-pantsuit."

"I never said I would wear them," Lou grins and turns back to her phone.

"Are you nervous about the interview?" Debbie asks.

"A little."

"We've got it," Debbie reassures her. "We are both excellent liars, we've known each other forever and we live together. We know everything there is to know."

She would never admit it to anyone, but she's a little nervous herself. Debbie knows Lou draws from her calm though, so she feigns it. She's not nervous, usually, she thrives on the thrill and the adrenaline, but this time it's not about money or diamonds.

Debbie wakes up in the middle of the night, her head still on Lou's lap. Lou's head has fallen to the side at some point and it looks really uncomfortable. She wakes her up gently and convinces her to go to bed. They change out of their fancy clothes that are now a bit wrinkled and fall into bed almost immediately. Debbie misses the comfortable warmth of Lou, so she turns over and snuggles against her back and wraps an arm around her before falling asleep again.

*

 Their interview is four days later. They follow the more reasonable advice of the immigration site, although they would have probably done all of it anyway. They're on time, they wear semi formal clothes, which are really just their normal clothes, and they brought all the necessary documents and some photos.

They're interviewed by a man, probably in his sixties,  who introduces himself as Robert Jenning.

"So you're married for - what now?" He asks and ruffles through his documents.

"Four days, "Debbie supplies.

"And how's married life treating you?"

"Couldn't be better."

He looks up from his files and studies them for a moment.

"Your marriage is under special investigation," he explains. "As stated in this document, you Mrs Miller, recently lost your green card, so you will hopefully understand that this seems like a very suspicious point in time to get married. So first of all, what was the reason you lost your green card?"

"It's Mrs Ocean, now." Lou corrects him.

"Of course." He takes a notebook from his desk and starts taking notes.

"My club had some inconsistencies in its tax return, and as the owner I am responsible even though I did not file it. But I assure you, it will never happen again."

"That's good to hear," he says and looks through his files again. "This rejection letter is dated to the 28th of August. When did you decide to get married?"

"Debbie proposed on June 23rd," Lou says and takes out the pictures. "We took those that evening."

They show him the picture with the calendar and the ring and one of Debbie sitting in front of her full plate.

"They're in our phones," Debbie supplies, "with date and time."

"We'll review that during the visit." Jenning seems to soften up a little with this knowledge. "Did you have the date for the wedding already?"

"We moved it up when we heard about the green card," Lou explains. They decided not to have too many coincidences in their story. "Originally we thought about next spring."

"Now you, Mrs. Ocean," he addresses Debbie, "were only recently released from prison. How long have you been together?"

"We were together for almost two years before I went to prison. I was stupid. We broke up, but instead of fighting for Lou and for us, I went to the next best guy and he made me the scapegoat for his crimes."

"A man?" He asks confused.

"It's called bisexuality." Debbie says and she can barely stop herself from rolling her eyes, but she should not upset the man who holds the power over Lou's visa. "I had five years, eight months and twelve days to realize that I never wanted to spend another day without this woman by my side." She takes Lou's hand and pulls it up to kiss the back of it. "As soon as I got out I went to her and told her what I should have told her years earlier. And she took me back."

Lou's eyes are fixed on their joined hands and when she looks up at her there's something Debbie can't quite name. "I missed her. I never wanted anyone else."

Objectively Debbie knows they're pretending, they lay it on thick to sell their story, but Lou's words make her feel warm inside. She sits there, lost in Lou's eyes and for a moment she forgets where they are and what they're supposed to do. She does have pretty eyes.

"How did you meet?" Jennings question comes crashing through her thoughts.

"A college bar, right after I came to this country." Lou answers.

"So you did not get together right away?"

"Oh no," Lou laughs. "It took us over 15 years, our friends really roasted us about it at the wedding."

He takes a moment to write some more notes down.

"How did you decide which last name to take?"

"I was never close to my family, I haven't seen my parents in more than 20 years, so I wasn't really attached to my last name, but Debbie's family was always important to her." Lou shrugs.

That was pretty much the conversation they had when they talked about it. Debbie suggested to just keep their names, but Lou said it would show their commitment, and right from the beginning Debbie liked the idea of Lou having her last name. It makes them even more of a family than they already were. It shows everyone that they belong together.

"I presume your parents were not guests of the wedding," he says and Lou nods. "What about your family?"

"Unfortunately my parents and my brother are deceased." Debbie says. "I would have loved to have them, but my sister in law was there."

"Do you plan to go away for a honeymoon?"

Debbie is about to say no, but Lou beats her to it. "Yes, but it depends on whether or not I'm allowed to stay in this country."

"We do?" Debbie asks. She's sure they did not talk about a honeymoon.

"There are plane tickets in our names and a hotel room in Monte Carlo for two weeks, it was supposed to be a surprise." Lou smiles at her. "Debbie loves to play cards."

It completely throws her off her guard. It's been years, obviously with all that time in prison, since she's been on vacation or that she had the opportunity to gamble. Danny taught her how to play poker and blackjack when she was little, it always made her feel close to him, even when they didn't see each other for long periods of time.

"God, I love you," Debbie breathes out and she really wants to kiss Lou, so she leans over to her and does. It takes a second for Lou to react, but then she kisses back and Debbie tries to put all her gratitude into the kiss.

Jenning clears his throat a moment later and Debbie leans back into her chair. He looks at them quizzical and after a few seconds of torturing silence he smiles.

"So far I don't see any reason to deny the conditional green card," he declares. "You will still be under investigation and I would like to visit you at home before you leave."

*

Two days later Debbie finds herself in their living room with Lou by her side and five women swarming a slightly flustered Mr. Jenning. Except for Nine Ball, who refused to attend anything that would require herself identifying to an government official, none of them could be kept from the loft for this occasion.

So far it went pretty well. They started to make their introductions and when it was Daphne's turn she didn't get to say a word before he disbelievingly said "you're Daphne Kluger! And you're Rose Weil!" and started to look nervously back and forth between them.

Debbie expected him to know Daphne, she is one of the biggest movie stars of their time, but she was a little surprised he knew Rose. That was until he added shyly "my husband and I follow your relationship since all those articles about the Met Gala." Hence the flusteredness.

And now they're all telling him about hers and Lou's relationship.

"We've been double dating ever since Rose and I got together," Daphne says and he hangs on her lips. She shows him pictures of her and Rose in different disguises and tells him about different restaurants. "We went to that 3 star Italian place the other week, I could totally get you reservations if you have an anniversary up or something. The linguine are to die for."

They show him their engagement photos and Rose gushes "I've only known them for a few months, but there's no doubt they belong together."

Tammy tells lightly censored stories about them from when she met them that omit all the crimes involved. All of them work out really well for them so far, even if Tammy just tells how they actually behaved.

"Once, we went to a club, a few weeks after I met them, and Lou was flirting with this girl. Tall. Dark hair. Looked a lot like Debbie," she launches into another story. "After a few minutes Debbie rushed up to them, sat in Lou's lap and started talking in her ear. Lou never even looked at the girl again. They've always been in love, they just couldn't see it."

Debbie remembers that evening, she had finally had an idea how to evade the one security camera that stood between them and a successful art theft. It had been loud and crowded, so she had to get Lou's attention someway. And if she scared away that girl it was better for the job anyways. She needed Lou with her head in the game. It's all the more reason for why it's a good idea for them to just spend their lives together. Even more so now that Debbie discovered how much she likes kissing Lou.

"They have the kind of special relationship my mother always wishes for me," Amita adds and Debbie thinks they overdo it a little. Lou seems to think so, too, if the uneasy twitching of her fingers is any indication. Otherwise she appears to be absolutely calm, she has an extraordinary poker face, but Debbie knows her well enough to notice the subtle hints.

She puts her hand over Lou's and presses it gently down onto her leg. She leans over and kisses Lou's cheek. "It's okay," she whispers and after a few more twitches Lou's hand stills.

When she turns her focus back to the others Constance tells Jenning "they practically adopted me" which is ridiculous.

"You have parents," Lou deadpans and it's what Debbie was about to say.

"You're also 29," Debbie adds.

"You can't have enough people looking out for you," Constance shrugs and it's pretty disarming.

He spends some time looking through the loft, but there's not much to see. They've been living together for a while now so their stuff is mixed up anyway and they put up some photos of them and of Debbie's family, because they assumed that's what Jenning wants to see.

He returns a short while later and seems content.

"For now I don't find anything objectionable," he says. He turns to the door but changes his mind quickly and adresses Daphne and Rose nervously. "Would you two take a picture with me?"

Constance takes his phone and snaps a few pictures of him between the two women and he looks really happy in all of them.

"My husband will be so jealous, " he grins and walks out of the door. "Enjoy your honeymoon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things for this chapter:  
> \- that 'no flip flops, no shorts' tip is a real thing I read while doing research on the marriage immigration process and it's ridiculous  
> \- google probably thinks I want to move to America via marriage scam now  
> -why is the english word 'visa' singular??? it is clearly a plural latin origin word and its singular form is visum! 
> 
> Also, let's play a game called "how many times can Debbie kiss Lou until she snaps?"

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr at ghost-in-your-house.tumblr.com if you want. 
> 
> Comments and feedback are appreciated and will probably make me write the rest of this faster.


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